i love my new car :3
TL Type S!!! this car is sex on wheels!
Shit Non-Smokers Say
fallin for…
every time i see the glaze in your eyes
i always wanna tell you how i feel as a surprise
i could be feeling terrible and just straight up shitty
but my day is made up by seeing your face so pretty
ive always wanted to ask this one question
but its a statement thats concealed by a confession
i apologize but i have to tell you all my emotions
otherwise itll wash away into the wide open ocean
so whats all the commotion? is it hard to give devotion to the girl who gave you this healing potion?
called love at first sight, but i call it freedom
i hope you think the same way and say “damnnn! i really need him!”
i’ll be there for you despite my license suspension
being with you just puts me in a different dimension
tension, that feels warm yet soft at the same time
i wanna take your heart and i hope you claim mine
im fake
i act sooo fake cause i try fitting in… i wanna fit in cause i dont have many friends im close with… it sucks being by yourself all the time… my only friend in nova may have to move back to korea… like i have no idea what im gonna do if he leaves… it sucks… life sucks… just tired of waiting for “that friend” i hate being different… God why did you make me sooo different? like i love it but i hate it at the same time… i love it because i know theres nobody like me but i hate it cause i can never relate to people fully… i wanna die like wtf… i hate walking alone… yeah i smile alot… im lead to believe smiling is healthy but it is also the greatest master of disguise… im tired of being so broken… yeah i have God to always pick me up but i need somebody physically too… like damnnn i hate having nobody… i mean alot of it is my fault… actually its all my fault… my tats, my nasty attitude, my selfishness, my social awkwardness, my brokeness, my attention whoreness, just everything… too many things that make me a piss of shit… i mean majority of the time you wont see that side unless your close with me… well ive improved in alot of aspects of my flaws but i still struggle with many of em. idk i can only point that finger at myself. i mean im super nice, im actually a very generous person… im sometimes to generous… i pay for people when i have nooo bread… i screw myself over by paying for other people’s food, movie tickets, and etc… like i dont expect you to pay me back… i mean if you insist you better pay me back… its not that i hold grudges just im gonna rely on you to pay me back cause i actually need the money… and if you keep moving back the dates or delay payin me back then i just wanna say fuck it and fuck you. i trusted you and you cant ome through while im strugglin? cool, you have a great heart by leading me with a completely fake promise… i mean i say fuck you but i’ll forgive and forget all the time cause i know people make mistakes all the time. and your mistake was making me a promise you couldnt keep… just ughhh, im a jackass but id rather many people not see my bad side. 99.99% of the time you will see my fake side… happy, laughing all the time, and just super nice… i guess maybe if i stop acting fake people would care for me more… but then again acting real wont get me friends either… i’ll tell my story and every person that sees my brokenness will ALWAYS leave me there to suffer… the pain doesnt hurt anymore i just dont give a flying fuck amymore… if you want me to open up i’ll open up… but its always the people that pretend to care. why do you want me to open up when i know you dont care? whatever. these are my dumb stupid ass problems… if your following me feel free to unfollow… i wont get offended nor do i care. tumblrs just a good place for me to air out my pathetic thoughts. i dont want something i just want somebody… i need a physical shoulder to cry on… i’ll be there for other people when they need a shoulder to cry on (not all the time cause if was always id be lying like a bitch) but when i need a shoulder to cry on NOBODY’S there… God is but spiritual presence can make people go crazy O.o i mean i dont need a physical person… “I can do all things through Him who gives me strength!” i only rely on God because He’s all i got. “you dont realize God is all you need till He’s all you have” i dont want you to feel sorry for me or want you to reach to me… just id rather you not do shit… dont break my heart again… its been broken far to many times with “fake friendships” im used to the pain cause its happened sooo many times but seriously dont try to help unless you genuinely want too… if you hurt me the pain will last for a day, i’ll be bitter for what you did for that day, hate you just that day, and the next day i’ll forgive and forget… ive gone through this process a countless amount of times… its not even funny… like i dont need your sympathy. its just gotten to the point where i dont care if you care. i just want you to listen. i dont want anything from you other than your ears so you can listen to me… yeah im selfish, its how i am and i pray to God all the time that i can be more selfless…